Thursday, April 2, 2009

3 weeks!

Only 3 more weeks until I leave for Alberta! I can't even explain the excitement I'm feeling! I'm not sure if I've ever been THIS sure that I'm going to be where I'm supposed to be! I've always been blessed throughout my life with feelings of confirmation if I'm doing what I'm supposed to be doing... but never like this! I feel like my insides could jump out of my throat at any minute! It's quite the feeling!

I gave a talk in church a couple of weeks ago... talk about opposition! Somebody did NOT want me to give this talk... I didn't think it was very important.. it was just about finding guidance through the scriptures and I never really felt like I ever found much guidance through the scriptures. Usually it was through my own prayers or general conference talks. I had no idea what I would even talk about. Also, of course the week before was FULL of work, work, and more work. Saturday night I came home from work in tears because I hadn't had a chance ALL week to work on it. 30 mins and 4 conference talks later, I was done. Not excited about it, but it was done. Sunday morning I arrive at church only to have forgotten it at home. So I sped home as fast as possible and got back to church without a second to spare. I think I was even out of breath as I got up to the podium. After sacrament meeting, I received a few comments that they loved my talk and were even touched by specific things I said. It made me feel good to know that I was able to say things that some people needed to hear. Also, about half way through my talk, I said something out of the blue, that was something that I MYSELF needed to hear... it was a scripture that said something about how doing the right things in life will guide you to be happy or something. SO little did I know, I HAVE been receiving guidance through the scriptures my whole life! It was pretty neat. Plus the whole time I was speaking, I was feeling amazing feelings of confirmation that the guidance I received about going to Lethbridge was definitely from God and that He wants me to be there right NOW.

After church, one of my home teachers approached me and said that after having watched me stand up there and give a great talk with such confidence, poise, and faith, that he had to come home teach me that night. He said he had something he needed to tell me, and that home teaching was the way to do it. So they came by that night, and we all small talked for a few minutes and then he said (paraphrasing of course) "I've been feeling like I need to say this to you for some time now, I just never knew when or how. Someday, somebody is going to see you for who you are. He's going to see your integrity, faith, confidence, beauty, and it is going to take his breath away. He will wonder how you've gone this long without being taken by somebody else. I know this because that is what happened when I found my wife. And it's going to happen for you soon. I know this. " Now I'm not sure if he has the "right" I guess to receive revelations like that for me as my home teacher, but it certainly made me feel really good about myself and it gave me that little boost of faith I've really been needing lately. I figure my Heavenly Father knows me, and knows my home teachers, and knows exactly what I need to hear so why wouldn't He inspire them to say it to me?

Things are good ... and they're about to get even better :) Not necessarily easier, but I feel like I'm going to experience some joy that I'm not even aware exists right now. Maybe marriage, maybe kids, maybe not. But in some way for sure...

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