Kiss the ham!!

New post? Sure why not..

So I'm not going to Australia anymore. Things just didn't happen that way. I was disappointed, but kinda relieved at the same time. I read back on an old blog entry that I wrote before I moved here to Lethbridge and I was very excited to come here. I knew it was the right thing to do. So I feel like I should stay awhile longer. I made the right choice.

Taneil and I are moving out! We got ourselves a cute little apartment... and it's walking distance to a grocery store, my bank, subway, blockbuster, a dollar store, a pizza place, basically everything you could ever want. All it needs is a Denny's and it'd be just like when I lived in Calgary. I can't wait to only have 1 roommate. I think I'll feel a lot more grown up.. Not sure why... but I think I will. And if any of my food goes missing, I'll know who to blame :)

I'm not going to school next semester. I barely went this semester, so I know I'd only fail if I tried to go next semester. I need a break. I might still go to Australia in Feb or March on a vacation for a couple weeks. We'll see. All I know, is I can't do school right away.

My life is boring, right? I know! Well for some reason my co-workers don't think so. Maybe it's due to all the stories they MAKE UP about me. I swear I'm always the topic of conversation. Did you know I've had secret affairs with at least 3 different co-workers in the 18 months I've worked there? I sure didn't. In fact, one is going on right now. People are even getting mad at me because they think I'm lying to them. Makes me laugh, because I don't find myself exciting enough to discuss! Haha.. maybe I'll just play it up...

Preference!! Preference was fantastic this year! Especially since I wasn't planning on going until about a week before. Jen found a date and it made me jealous so I found one too! Dave. I actually had never had a conversation with him before I asked. But Jen (my old roommate) and Megan (my sister) knew him from Calgary so I figured it'd be safe. We had a super good time together and with the other 2 couples we were with. We cooked dinner, and went on a photo scavenger hunt. Let's just say I made some new friends at the University :) Oh.. Dave and I lost.... so we had to dance with brooms at the dance. Wasn't really a punishment... we kinda enjoyed it!

Christmas is coming and I CAN'T WAIT!! I'm so excited to go home and be with my family. AND this year we have a new addition joining us! Leah!! So needless to say, it should be a pretty fantastic one :) (Oh, and I just bought my secret santa from work the PERFECT present. So I'm excited about that too.)

Well that's it. It's 2am and I have to pee. Both signals that it's time for bed.

Dear October: I love you.

I love October. I love how it smells, how it looks, and how it sounds. I love crispy leaves, the smell of bonfires/fireplaces, thanksgiving (even though I don't get a turkey dinner this year....), the orange/yellow/red trees, and I even kinda like Halloween even though I rarely celebrate it! I love October.

Life is pretty grand these days. I have an amazing family, even though they are too far away :( Megan is close-ish, and she came down to visit a couple weekends ago and it was fantastic. We got to go to the temple together. She needs to visit more often. Oh.. and my niece Leah is perfect :) She loves me, and I love her. My trip home in August was awesome! I got to see so much family, even though I slept in 5 different beds over the space of a week and a half. I was ready to come back to Lethbridge at the time, but now I already can't wait to go back for Christmas, and possibly even New Years.

Lethbridge has connected me to some very amazing people. I still may not have the largest group of friends/acquaintances, but I have never had so many CLOSE life long friends (or dare I say, soul mates?) as I do right now. Taneil is amazing. I don't know what I'd do without her these days. She is my roommate, and lives in the basement with me. We make each other laugh in the oddest of ways, and I think that's why I love her so much. I can be me, she can be her. We even share milk! Braden is also fabulous. He is in Australia :( I miss him. He called me yesterday though. He says "I just called to say that I'm lying on the beach in the sun. I thought you would want to know." Jerk. We joke about how we bring out the worst in each other... but I think in reality it is quite the opposite. I can be me, and he can be him. Isn't that what true friendship is? I love feeling like I can be %100 myself without fear of being judged. Good people judge my flaws, and not-so-good people judge my strengths. My soul mates just love me. :) (Obviously my family is included in this "soul mate" category)

So.... if Taneil and Braden are my besties... what would be the funnest thing I could possibly do in January? Braden is in Australia... Taneil and I are not... So.....Taneil and I are GOING TO AUSTRALIA IN JANUARY!!! I can't believe there was a time where I was actually hesitant to go for it. I talked to a ton of people about it, and not a single person told me it was a bad idea. Everyone said to go for it. I might even get some co-op credit for it, since I'd be helping Braden with his business down there. I can't wait. Talk about adventure. I'll be able to add Australia to the list of places I've been to. (France, Switzerland, Belgium, Luxembourg, and Australia!) I've always wanted to go, so why not?

Yup. Life is grand.

I like your beard.

Simple Summer Update.

Summer has been..... decent so far.

First of all, I need to say how happy I am that the great Taneil Wilson lives with me now :D She is SO entertaining and awesome. I can't help but smile and laugh when she is around. I heart her.

I turned 28 last month..... ew. But it WAS the best birthday I think I've ever had! Taneil, Sarah P. and I drove down to Idaho to visit Josh and Kenny and it was a FABULOUS trip! It was all very.... Idaho. We went camping Friday night, made dutch oven potatoes, roasted starburst over a fire, almost got stuck in the mud.. awesome. Saturday we went to Logan to this really neat outdoor art fair. Josh had a painting on display and someone totally bought it :) That night we went to a demolition derby!! So hick, but so awesome! Sunday we went to church in Josh's ward, and he happened to give a talk that day. That afternoon we went to see his dad's fox/mink farm. I had no idea that foxes make crow-like noises. Kinda freaked me out but it was pretty hilarious to see Sarah shed tears once she realized what the farm was for! All in all, a great weekend, and it was SO great to see Josh and Kenny. Plus, Chris and Mike came down from Rexburg for a bit so it was fun to see them too. Taneil and I might go back later next month... we'll see. I also want to go to BC for a couple days, so we'll see what ends up happening.

Work is going well. I work with a few pretty cool peeps who make it interesting ;) I don't have to close at ALL this month, so I'm hoping that I will be able to find many adventures to go on.

However, I'm trying to save my money so I can go home for a visit in August. By then, my lightly-toasted niece will be born (aka little mixie) and I can't wait to be an aunt :)

BSB next month!!!! I'm going to ANOTHER Backstreet Boys concert August 8th in calgary :) I'm going with Taneil and Jessica. We scored 6th row floor seats! I'll finally get to see them the way I was always meant to see them :)

Oh. So I heard that it takes 30 days to break a bad habit and I'm putting this to the test. I've already broken the habit of biting my nails. It's only taken me a lifetime to do this, and I finally have! It's kinda hard to believe actually. I keep waking up in the morning afraid that I may have bitten them all off in my sleep or something, but I never do! They're beautiful :) Also, I'm working on the caffeine habit. I finally admitted to myself that I actually am addicted, and I have the headaches to prove it. I'm trying to wean (sp?) myself off of it because when I go cold turkey, I get bad headaches and get super cranky. But I'm doing pretty well. Today is day 2 without ANY caffeine. I figure if I cut it out completely while at work, that'll be half the battle. I have one or two other things that I'm working on, and so far so good.

Well this post is over. Not because I have nothing more to say, but because I really have to pee. (I've replaced pop with water and my bladder has definitely noticed...)

... and summer begins!

..ok so maybe not weather wise quite yet, but school is over for the summer and I'm VERY excited about it. I actually did WAAYY better in my classes than I thought I would. I was afraid I'd fail economics and have to take it again, but I pulled off a B-! I have no idea how that happened because I definitely had a C-/D+ going into the final.... I guess I'm a better guesser than I thought! I also got a B+'s in both accounting AND "managing responsibly in a global environment" and I got an A- in Organizational Behavior. So not too shabby at all considering I barely ever went to class.... oops!

2 of my roommates are moving out. Carle and Erin. It's a little weird, but I'm grateful that 2 of my best friends here are moving in!! Sarah and Taneil. I'll see them all summer anyway, so it makes sense that they may as well just live with me :) I'm excited!

I tried to ride a bike today for the first time in years and it did not end well. We were riding downtown, and we rode by my work place and I pointed "hey that's where I work!" and.... I fell off :( I scraped my chin, skinned my hand, and bruised up my knee pretty badly actually... It's super swollen.. I feel like I'm wearing a knee pad. It hurts and its huge and purple :( Plus everyone at work saw me fall, as well as a few random customers so I was super embarassed. At least I fell where I could go in and wash up I guess... And at least I have an excuse to buy new jeans since I ripped the ones I was wearing. What really sucks about it, is that there was this big social tonight at this local restaurant/bar and Megan came to Lethbridge to go to it. It was great to see her, but I couldn't stay very long because of my knee. It just kept throbbing and getting bigger and bigger. So I had to give up and go home to nurse my wounds :(

People are leaving for the summer. Luckily not too many of my friends are leaving, but Braden is leaving and I'm actually going to miss him a butt load. He and I have become pretty good friends and I'm really grateful for our friendship. We have a lot of fun together in class (which may be partly why I almost failed economics) and we laugh a LOT. Plus we have some pretty good serious conversations sometimes too. He's definitely one of my very favourite people. It's nice to have a platonic relationship with a guy like this. His advice has a completely different perspective which often helps a lot. I'm gonna miss him..

I hope to be able to go home for a visit this summer. I'm slightly poor... but we'll see. I need to convince someone at work to quit so I can have more hours. I just really miss my family and it's been almost a year since I've seen Faith and Rainer. Plus my niece is scheduled to arrive into the world in July, so I'd really like to meet her before Christmas! I can't wait to be her favourite aunt.... suck it Megan ;)

Ok... I'm feeling light headed and nauseous.. I think its time to elevate my leg and go to bed.

Happiness is...

This Song.

This Dance. (especially Quest Crew's part)

These Girls.

This Quote.

My Niece.

Man is most nearly himself when he achieves the seriousness of a child at play

Can I just say, that I am having the WORST Olympic withdrawls?? Seriously.... the Olympics were probably the best 2 weeks of my Lethbridge life! I'm not really sure why.. I think it all started when the torch came through. That was a fabulous evening. Then, my roommate Kathryn and I became OBSESSED with speed skating. There just happened to be a day where neither of us had anything specific to do that day, so ALL we did was watch speed skating. It was far too much fun than it should've been, so we spend the next 2 weeks sitting in just about the same spots watching anything to do with the Olympics. We laughed, we cried (I cried), we yelled at koreans.... it was fabulous. Unfortunately for us, McDonalds was an Olympic sponsor... which resulted in the consumption of a few too many chicken mcnuggets....why? Because "the TV told us to..." The gold medal hockey game was AMAZING!! Scott came by to watch it with us.... I fear that we frightened him a little with our intense Olympic love. Before it started, I made a comment about how awesome it would be if it was a close game... I regretted saying that when I was so afraid we might lose that I felt sick to my stomach.... but we won. It was GLORious :) I skipped class, she skipped work, and now we're both really sad it's all over :( But at least we totally bonded and I pretty much love her freaking guts.

School has been....... boring. I hate pretty much all my classes this semester. It's a miracle that I passed my first Economics midterm.. I tend to.. not... go... to class... But i'll pull it off. I always do :) I put a lot of the blame on Braden, who is in 2 of my classes with me. We kinda just sit at the back and talk about his girl issues, my boy issues, and our mutual issues with some mutual friends... We laugh a lot.... we just don't learn a lot... Meh!

Work is fine. I'm a little concerned for the summer however.. everyone will want more hours, but there are actually less hours to be had in the summer. One good thing though is that I'm kind of being trained to have more responsibility which will give me more opportunities to work specific shifts that the other girls won't be able to have. For some reason, the powers-that-be LOVE me there.. I might even start working in the kitchen for some extra hours. We'll see.

Two weeks ago, there was a dance. During the dance, I auditioned for the talent show that's coming up next week. I'm singing "Misguided Ghosts" by Paramore. It actually sounds really good. Scott is playing the guitar for me. He had never heard the song, but he learned it because I asked him to. It was really nice of him, and he's really talented. Braden was on the "judging panel" and I think I surprised him a little bit. He didn't really know that I was musical at all. I guess I've hidden my talents a little while I've been here in Lethbridge.. not really sure why. I know I'm not the best singer in the world, but I'm not terrible and I enjoy doing it when I get the chance. Anyway, the main point of the story was that I got all dressed up, was feeling pretty dang good about myself, and sang to these people, most of whom I barely knew. They LOVED it and gave me the only golden ticket of the night. (It was a yellow post-it that had GOLD written on it....) I left the room, strutted into the dance that was kind of struggling, and got that party started! Confidence is everything!! I always heard that, but never believed it! I felt good, I looked good (you know it...) and had a blast! AND even got asked to dance by a boy who WASN'T 18!!! Ok... so maybe it was just Scott .. but still! People have been complaining ever since about how terrible the dance was.. but it was one of my favourites so far! I plan on making every dance that great. I have to give a shout-out to Naomi.. I'm not sure what it is, but there's just something about her that brings out the awesomeness in me! (I say awesomeness, other people may say overwhelmingness.. if that's even a word...)

Scott and I went on a double date last weekend with Naomi and Cody. It was super casual.. mostly just an excuse to hang out with some great friends.. We played around in Walmart for awhile... doing things that are only funny to high school kids, and Mormons. Then we went to the park, got some delicious starbucks, and watched a movie back at my place. It was fun!

This brings me to my most recent epiphany. I have learned that I'm a silly person, and I always will be. The times I'm the happiest are when I'm truly myself, and I can only really be myself when I am around people who make me feel comfortable in my own skin. This is why when I find people like this, I become so attached to them that it is hard for me to let them go. This is why I depend on being surrounded by friends/family. My patriarchal blessing talks about the strong character and pleasant personality that I brought with me from my pre-mortal life. I can just picture myself running around in the spirit world being silly (but reverent!) and smiling a lot. This is because I was comfortable there. I imagine I was with my family, and friends, and Heavenly parents who all loved me for me. The purest version of me. The version that sometimes emerges when I'm with people that I love, who love me for me, and who bring out my best qualities. This is why I'm the happiest when I'm good, keeping the commandments, helping others, and laughing. I have been very lucky to have a few of those days here in Lethbridge... those days where I feel like myself :)

Things that made me smile this week. (Yes... I`m copying my sister)

- The Olympic torch in Lethbridge!

- The people who accompanied me to view the torch :)

- Angie Johnson and her drive-by valentine

- Not one, but TWO hugs after teaching in Relief Society. (I love when other people enjoy and learn from my lessons)

- Working my LAST SATURDAY NIGHT SHIFT!! WOOOOO!!!! (I`m a little excited about this..)

- Being called "Lou" (I secretly hope it sticks..)

- Seeing Lindy hold a puppy

- Re-remembering every day that I`m going to finally be an aunt :)

This is a picture of part of our Olympic-torch-viewing group. I know I could`ve been more patriotic, but I had just woken up from a nap when I was kidnapped to come to this event.... thus no time to plan a sweet outfit.

Changes

This past week sucked. Therefore, I have decided to make the following changes to ensure it never happens again:

1. Drink a LOT less caffeine. I took a break from it completely for a few days to see if there would be any physical consequences, and there weren't really. So I am allowing myself to have a diet coke every so often. I experimented with energy drinks lately and I am cutting those back out of my life. I kept away from them for a reason.

2. a) Surround myself with good, uplifting people. I made the mistake of trying to be friends with some of the people I work with, and it blew up in my face. There is no need for that. It all started with what I thought was an innocent staff party... on a sunday... with drinking... I justified it because I wasn't drinking and staff parties are so rare that I didn't want to miss out, even though it was on a Sunday. That was a mistake. Drama ensued. The people I work with are dragging me down and making me into a person I'm not proud of. I wanted to help them become better people, and instead they are making me a worse one. Friday night I went out to Humpty's (Denny's ugly step child) for breakfast with some great people. I laughed like I hadn't laughed in awhile. It was great. These same people are the ones who comforted me out of a nervous emotional breakdown tonight. Linda calmed me down, and Braden gave me a beautiful blessing.

b) In order to help with a), I am going to try to get my schedule changed so that I'm not working until 1am every Saturday night so that I can actually be around these great people more often. Also, I will a LOT less temped to skip church the next morning due to working too hard and too late the night before.

3. Study the scriptures more/every day. I have been slacking in this department. Not cool.

4. Watch my language. The people I work with do not watch theirs. This spreads like a disease and I have caught myself saying things I have never/rarely said before in my life. Also not cool.

5. Laugh everyday. I used to be really good at this. I don't remember TONS about being little, but I do remember I was happy and I had a good childhood. I remember laughing a lot with my siblings. I want to laugh more. It feels SO GOOD when I do.

6. Take the pursuing of my second degree more seriously. It is not just a hobby, even though I have been treating it as such. I got fairly good grades, but I could've done better. I'm going to look into taking a co-op this summer. This would give me some GREAT experience, help me build some useful skills, and give me an excuse to quit my current job.

7. Be happy / Try my HARDEST not to compare my life to others.

Wish me luck.